Cobra or eagle? Argument styles in the workplace
By CareerBuilder blogger on Oct 21, 2008 in Featured
The Chicago Tribune’s RedEye magazine has an article today that discusses the ways people debate and argue.
The article speaks to argument styles that we use in all aspects of our lives. One of the experts RedEye talked to is author Lynn Eisaguirre. She wrote “The Power of a Good Fight,” which specifically addresses workplace conflicts and suggests ways to resolve them.
Eisaguirre’s book categorizes some of the debating and arguing styles. She’s labeled these approaches by assigning each an animal with similar characteristics.
Pit bull
Pit bulls are warriors who thrive on conflict and love to argue for argument’s sake. They’re extremely competitive and are always in aggressive mode. Sometimes, the force they use is disproportionate to the problem at hand.
A co-worker with a pit bull persona bullies others by e-mailing in all caps and bringing up personal vulnerabilities. They’re always on the defensive.
Dealing with a pit bull: Be firm, patient and pleasant. The more consistent you are, the less aggressive and defensive they’ll be in return.
Cobra
Cobras have some of the aggression of pit bulls, but are slithery and sneaky. They never argue with the person they’re directly in contact with, choosing instead to create conflict indirectly to create repercussions for their target. This might include pitting co-workers against each other, or starting rumors that take on a life of their own.
Their slithery, indirect nature usually stems from a lack of self-esteem; cobras generally see themselves as “the underdog” with less power than their opponent.
Dealing with a cobra: Call them out on their actions. Tell them you’re aware of what they’re doing. Then ask what you can do (or your team can do) to improve the issue and improve channels of communication, so they don’t have to rely on slithering around.
Golden retriever
As you might guess, golden retrievers are the happy-go-lucky types. They generally try to avoid confrontation by appeasing others and putting the feelings of others first.
Golden retrievers have a need to be liked. Though they can be a positive force in the workplace, they’re also somewhat of a mystery. They’re often the “tofu” co-worker, who takes on the flavor of whoever they’re with.
Dealing with a golden retriever: The initial reaction or response from a golden retriever is often a grudging agreement…or a passive-aggressive one. Try to dig deeper beyond their inital reactions to find out what they really think.
Roadrunner
Roadrunners are experts at avoidance. It’s not a matter of just being a “yes” person like a golden retriever; roadrunners will often bypass the discussion altogether.
When they do slow down from their speedy paths of avoidance, they’re unlikely to commit to a yes or no answer or a particular path until they’ve had time to think about what they’re going to say.
Dealing with a roadrunner: If you need their input or agreement, make sure you give them time to research the issue or look into their options. Allow them time to feel confident about their decisions so they don’t take off and leave you in the dust.
Eagle
According to Eisaguirre’s book, the eagle exemplifies the best approach to argument and debate. An eagle recognizes how conflict can ultimately be beneficial in the workplace.
Among the successful tools of an eagle:
- Think through your argument. Be prepared to answer questions and participate in some push/pull when you debate your point of view.
- Acknowledge that conflict can be useful, and that debate and constructive criticism can actually make your process, product or idea stronger.
- Approach the process with balance and respect for opposing points of view.
Be sure to take a closer look at Eisaguirre’s book. She goes into much greater detail on these concepts and the pros and cons of these roles.
What’s your argument/debate style?
